August 15, 2013

  • Visualizing Perfection

    Some of you may have seen my previous post about "My Perfect Day" from earlier this week. It wasn't a real day, not yet, but it is a day I hope will come at some point in the future. I was thinking about what I would consider an ideal twenty-four hours due to a book I had just finished reading called "Love is a Thief" by Claire Garber. I plan to do a review about the book itself on my book blog at some point soon, so I won't get into that here.

    The basic premise of the book is the main character, Kate, has just gotten out of a relationship and had to ask herself: What do I like doing? What did I not get to do because I was in a relationship? What would I be happy doing for the rest of my life? And so began her quest to discover what her "love-stolen dreams" are and set about accomplishing them.

    One of the characters in the novel is a life coach Kate goes to see, and he walks her through a visualization exercise. And before you start saying not to believe everything I come across in a fictional works, I do know that many coaches suggest visualization to help you reach your goals. I had recently come across the practice in my quest for fitness, and didn't think to apply it to the larger picture that is my entire life.

    The life coach has Kate imagine her perfect day, saying it would help her figure out what she wants out of life. Too many people focus on what they don't want, so the universe --and your brain-- hears are the same words repeated over and over again... and it isn't hearing the "don't" part of the equation. That is why so many people get exactly what they don't want, rather than what they do.

    This exercise will help focus on what you truly desire and whenever you feel discouraged,  you can think back to this dream day and remind yourself why you're doing what you are: It is taking life one step at a time to reach your goal.  And it isn't just the material or physical aspects of the dream you should take note of, but the feelings of emotion you have as well. Joy, excitement, contentment, love, friendship... It's all there. Every morning you should take a few minutes to go back to your perfect day, so you become used to feeling that way. You deserve to be happy, and shouldn't feel guilty about a lack of stress or worry or sadness or anger or frustration.

    So that's what I did. I took some time, did my yoga deep-breathing to clear and calm my mind, and then spent a few minutes imagining what my perfect day would be like. I saw myself having a wonderful husband with a child on the way, I was a published author and an editor, I was living in the UK, had some really cute vehicles, was still in touch with my best friends... It really is simply perfect. It is everything I want in life: a loving family, wonderful friends, a job I enjoy, and living in a place that feels like home.

    We spend far too much time in the present reality and don't take enough time to just...be. Be ourselves, be truthful about our hopes and desires, be happy. If we focus on what our current and possibly unsatisfactory life is, then we'll get bogged down and start to lose hope. And that is so important, because without the hope of what may come, faith we can achieve our dreams, and a love of self, what is life really worth existing for? I can achieve my dreams. I will have my perfect day. And I know I deserve to have everything my heart truly desires.

    What is your dream day like and do you believe you deserve to have it?

    SUMR